Creole Wisdom

my (short) review

I saw Precious this evening. I had debated about seeing it, since I already knew I would have a negative reaction to it. But since I wanted to properly critique it, I needed to watch the film for myself.

I will give Precious two things: fantastic acting and great cinematography.

What I did not like about this film:

-It literally degrades the black American family. Please come and film a movie about my life, or another average black person. I do understand that these stories exist, but this could of been literally any poor person's story, but it becomes a "black thing."

-The film causes you to hate the mother. Of course, but what about Precious' father? We never see his face, and so the film places the blame onto the mother- when in reality the rape was never her fault.

-As I watched it, I couldn't help but think of how during slavery masters and much of white America viewed black women as poor mothers because a few African women has thrown their children into the water when they were taken into bondage on slave ships. This film was degrading to black motherhood.

-Much too graphic. There are other ways of getting a violent point across.

-The incest thing really bothers me, because, and I'll be frank- it's not a black thing. I'm not saying that obesity and poverty are, but incest, that's not something that happens much in the black community compared to in others...

-And I'll stay on that topic for a few more minutes, why is it permissible that the incest is part of this film, but was never even alluded to in Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, when it was part of the book? Can we not "see" white actresses like Ashley Judd in roles like that?

-I hate that some of our schools do not provide the necessary means for students to thrive. I am frustrated with the disparities.

So, there we go- just a few of my thoughts on this.

just call me june.

Our theme at work for the month is centered around family. I love it, how exciting, and you can do so much with that. I'm hoping the two year olds will know and understand the terms "aunt, uncle, cousin, niece, and nephew" by the end. We'll see.

Like I usually do, I sent out a monthy family note, letting all the parents know what our upcoming theme is etc...

This crazy mother, oh goodness, she "wanted to talk" about the family unit. Uh. I'm thinking, this cannot be good. She's going to complain, like she always does.

So, I called her during nap time (i.e. my sanity break) and she began her long tirade. "My child is adopted" (yep, we know, and this is the city, we're not unaware) "my family lives out of state, my daughter won't know what a grandparent is" (so terribly sad), "I'm not married" (as my grandma says, people are doing it all backwards these days) "I only feed my child hot dogs" (just kidding!) and...

"I didn't like your June Cleaver tone in the family note."

She meant it as a dis, but I took that craziness as a complement.

June was nice.

wait. I can't keep up.

I am tired. This is to be expected. But beyond that, I am overextended. And I wish I could get back.

Right before I graduated my Women in the Holocaust class met to study for the [intense] final study night- but of course we ended up talking about... everything. One thing many of us spoke of, since we were on the cusp of commencement, was what was ahead of us.

Work, of course [if we were lucky], and then free weekends. I imagined myself going to yoga in the afternoons, and then getting into a cooking class or something. Basically not running around like a chicken with my head cut off.

Maybe I wasn't thinking how working both my jobs would keep me busy enough. I perceived getting done at 3:30 and being done then. I didn't realize I would sit in rush hour traffic and then barely have time to do two or three things plus run and then have to go to bed to start the cycle all over again. That is okay, but then, for some crazy reason I started to pile more on my plate.

Because I can't seem to have/do/say "yes" to enough things.

Like...
•Thinking/planning on running a marathon
•Meeting with people to see about writing a book
•Archiving all of my grandfather's photographs
•Doing more photography than usual for clients
•Writing up a 5 year goal list that is impressive and realizing I need to stick to it
•Deciding to do weekly babysitting for a girl in my class

Throughout this entire process I have realized a few things-
•I have a hard time saying "no," and need to learn how to do it for my own sanity's sake
•Right now my job is great, but I need to look for something more towards my career goal.  Yes, my real goal is to be a stay at home mom, but there are a few things I want to to before that, and it's not involving kids
•I really, really, really need to keep my Fridays to myself. I made the mistake of overextending myself to a parent at my preschool and agreed to babysit Fridays, and so I had to kind of backtrack today. Not a huge worry, and I shouldn't be afraid to do this. Of course I am assuming that saying "no" to every Friday will make them not want to use me as a sitter. So far this is not the case. I'm sorry if that is long winded and odd, but it's how my brain works.
•My family, friends, and boyfriend are a priority and I love spending time with them
•Moving into my apartment at the end of August will help as far as the rush hour, and sanity goes. Living at home has high and low points.
•Having jobs is such a blessing, and I am very thankful.

I have this irrational paranoia that I must do all things, but then when I try to do too much, I realize that I can't do them all well. Basically doing a million things half-a**ed. Obviously that is not my work ethic, so I need to zero in and focus.

Glad I got that out of my system. I need to get this all under control so I don't feel like my brain is spiraling out of orbit.

fml

So here's my list, graduation is May 17th.  I am really wondering if I am going to make it.  I'm graduating with a BA in gossiping Communications and minor (pending prayers. another post I tell ya) in History. 

Academic Pre-Grad:
•Hand in German History research paper (11 pages!)
•Prepare Nonverbal Group presentation (don't get me started! But I will sum it up for you in one sentence: foreign student who hardly knows English and doesn't want to pull her weight. oy vey!)
•Correct Nonverbal Group paper  (We are on about draft 5, see frustration above)
•Take Nonverbal test
•Take Interviewing final
•Take Holocaust final (organizing a fun study group!)
•Take German oral final (from the instructor grad student who thinks I am a dumb Greek.  And this dear readers, is why you shouldn't wear your letters until after the first graded assignment)
•Order cap & gown
•Pick up graduation tickets : )

Personal Pre-Grad:
•Buy Courtney's bed (so exciting.  I am getting a great deal!)
•Transport bed, chair, lamp, rug, nightstand to new apt (lease starts Sept, but I can use the storage room. yes!)
•Move out of AOII : (
•Send graduation party invites out
•Double check time off at work for PA & DC trip : )
•Sell desk to Katie (schools. out. forever.)
•Pick grad dress and iron gown
•Smile

But... but... but... I just want to go out with my sorority sisters and get happy hour with J and spend my whole weekend working at Melly and watch tons of movies in the basement.  Sorry to disappoint the parents, but I don't think I'm ever going to do this (school) again.  But I will take the gre : )

Can you get a masters degree is home economics with a focus in planning parties?

come on minnesota!

Today is April first.  April fools.  Whatever.  And I am sitting here at my desk looking out the window and what do I see? Snow.  Giant, fluffy, peacefully whirling flakes set across the backdrop of a collegiate urban landscape that is too tired and old.  What is so sad is that with the first snow fall I am happy.  I get excited and in the holiday mood (I start listening to Christmas music in October).  I don't mind snow in November, December, or even in March.

The blizzard of 2007 which canceled school.

But now it is too much to bear.  I realize that I have no control over the weather, and that this is probably the last of it.  But I'm still complaining, and I would like to note that this makes getting ready for class confusing.  What should I wear on my feet?  Rain boots or Sorels?  Because at least spring in MN will give you wet, rain-like snow that is still snow-

broken.

Two not so funny things in the span of two days. 
Yesterday:
•Went joyfully to go set up my new Epson printer.  I was so happy, so excited, singing to myself alongside the radio... then during step 2 of set up "error, turn off printer. then re-start" I did.  5 times. Then I called tech support. Verdict: "We're sorry, it looks like a problem with the motherboard of the printer.  We're going to Fedex you one in 5-7 business days."  Lovely.  So they put a hold on my debit card for the amount of the printer, which they'll release once I get the new (hopefully working) one.  Of all the luck in the world- I get the printer that has an "internal problem."  At least I get some free ink!

This morning:
•Today as I am walking outside to the car I slip and fall down on the ice (naturally).  And we're not talking a nice slip, but a fall on your a*s fall.  Of course my camera was slung over my shoulder.  I broke the piece that holds the battery in, and the lens cap was jammed, too.  Ugh.  I screamed a horrible, Alfred Hitchcock Psycho scream.  Someone help, my baby is hurt!
•I took the camera to National Camera, and the stupid, not to mention uncaring (hello, this is my baby, show some compassion!) tech told me that they don't to repairs, and that I'll have to wait a WEEK until I can get it repaired at the shop they refer to, because- that shop is "on vactaion."  Since when did stores go on vacation? Hm. I called them, and sure enough.  I can't fix my baby until January 6th.
•So what did I do?  I got out some duct tape, fixed the battery, and eased the jam out of the lens cap.  My camera works fine, so that's a relief, but I have learned my lesson- take better care of it.
•Becasue I have such a giant crumpler bag (to hold all of my lens, etc...) I don't have a smaller one.  That is tomorrow's job: find a smaller bag.

sushi.

•It was a good night, and i love Caterpillar rolls : )
•In car news: took the poor car to Abra, estimated repair costs of roughly $3500 : ( I keep going over the thing in my head.  I'm so angry at myself for making this mistake and getting in a dumb accident that could of harmed myself or others.  The whole day, as I was driving, I kept thinking about how dumb I am in the car/with cars.  I have a license, obviously, and other than yesterday, a perfect record, but I still feel like an idiot.  I am so thankful to mom who has taken this all over, and called Allstate, and dealt with everything.  What great timing. 

rush. jingle. sign. crash.

So... I got in a car accident today.  I have absolutely no idea how to feel about he entire thing, which is long from over.  Clearly I am not hurt, since I'm blogging about this (but really, would I let anything stop me? Probably not), and neither was the driver of the other car.  Thank goodness.

Let me paint a lovely picture for you, set to the tune of flight of the bumblebee...

Me: an observant person by nature driving in stop and go traffic.  on a four lane highway. after a crazy winter storm leaving the roads coated in spots of black ice and piled high on the sides with heavy snow. picture me realizing in sadness that I'm going the wrong direction, and will be late to meet dad in Edina.

Then. The traffic eased up a bit.  And then right before my eyes was another car.  Adlfdhlkfhsdklhfslh.  Too. Close. To. Stop.

So I put on the brakes, and by the grace of God I was in the right lane, so I obviously start to swerve right.  Start spinning thanks to said ice.  And managed to only slightly hit the car in front of me, and while only the right corner of his car is hurt the ENTIRE left side of mine gets banged up.

Ugh.  My fault : (

And the entire time I'm spinning, all I can think of is how angry my mother is going to be.  Not if I'll die, just how mad I'll make others.

Thankfully no one was hurt.  The other driver was very nice, he was 23, and consoled my hysterically crying self while exchanging information.  "I've been in a few accidents before, so I'm not too upset," he says to me. 

After that I drove, meeting both dad and mom in Edina.  We eat dinner.  And no one was mad.  Strangely.  I still feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, but right now it all looks like it won't be that horrible of an ordeal: the guy I hit, and I have the same insurance...  Mom said to me, "well good side to hit it on because there was some rust over there."  The only thing that sucks besides two giant dents near the back (where's Edward when I need him?) is that the passenger door is hard to open and only opens a little bit. This is motivation not to eat too much over break.

And what am I doing tomorrow?  Running around as usual, making a return, hanging out with dad, and seeing J.

But wait- I didn't fill you in on the REST of the day, let me sum it up:
•Hurried to get downtown before lunchtime (rush).
•Met Jana for the adorable 8th floor Macy's display (jingle)
•Met the bride and groom for whom I'm shooting a wedding for to sign photography contract (sign)

quarantine.

•It was Wednesday, my second day at work and third full day back at the sorority house.  With recruitment meetings running almost all morning and then some into the night plus work... you know- something had to go bad.
•Yesterday mom picked me up for a little dinner out at Pizza Nea, mmm.  I ran into the restroom before we sat down and looked in the mirror as I was washing my hands and saw... A BLOODSHOT EYE. 
•Then. I started. To swear.
•I dropped f-bombs all the way down the (empty) hallway.  This is not the time for pink eye...

(flash forward to sorority recruitment)
•"Hi, I'm Katie, don't you want to join my house?" with an ugly red eye... um, probably not.

•I get back out to the table and start crying.  Cause, you know, I'm a drama queen and don't do well with eye issues, see this.
•The waiter comes by and looks at me like I am crazy.  Then mom ordered the quattro fromaggio, and my tears slow down.

THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR THIS.  I have work. school. recruitment.  Ahhh. Just the thought of some toddler's poop bacteria swimming in my eye was so upsetting.  And I am so careful with germs... how (sob) could this happen (sob) to me?  I am hand sanitizer, gloves, 45-seconds of hand washing queen!

I get back to the sorority house and put up my quarantine sign.  I am not about to get anyone else sick.  Then I watched Barack Obama with a cold compress.

Thank goodness Alicia had her left-over pink eye drops and administered two for me (yes, I know that is wrong, but sharing medication is how I roll).  Picture this: me with my head back in a desk chair on the third floor of the sorority house, kind sister leaning over me... oh, so classy. 

Today, doctor's verdict: viral infection, not pink eye, and my eye is looking better- albeit I still have glasses on.  That was a close call. 

{Creole} Wisdom Teeth

This morning at about 8am I arrived at HCMC to get my wisdom teeth out.  Three things you ought to know before you read this post:
1) I have never had surgery. 
2)I have never been put under. 
3)I don't "do" hospitals. 

So I checked in and took a good look around me.  I read Eclipse and waited for my name to be called.

They took an ex-ray and then sat me down on the chair.  The surgeon (who had a U of MN lanyard on) spoke to me about just getting shots or going under.  I would have to come another day if I was to go under.  So awake I would be.

Getting those shots was extremely painful.  Soon after I started shaking a little bit and someone came with a blanket.  It was time to get the show on the road.

So I'm laying down and the surgeon is asking for tools and popping out my teeth like you'd pull out a difficult weed.  I can hear the drilling, popping, and cracks.  Overall, it took 12 minutes for all four of my teeth to come out.  It felt like an hour.

I must say, "watching" her put in the dis solvable stitches was pretty interesting.  Then turning around and seeing the teeth on her tray along with some fierce looking tools was not my cup of tea.

As soon as I was done I got my mouth stuffed with cotton and headed downstairs to get my prescriptions.  After waiting in line I was told I had to go back up because the doctor forgot to sign one sheet and I (for some random reason) could not have it filled there. 

When I got upstairs again I was a little upset about having to run around the big hospital and then coming back upstairs, and started crying.  I felt so stupid, since there was a really cute doctor who could see me and I'm sure he was thinking "good lord."  They fixed it though, and off I went to get my Rx refilled at my mom's clinic. 

Now I have my vicodin and smoothie so I am well.

Update:
Smoothies are wonderful, but French onion soup + wisdom teeth removal = disaster.
Yeah.  It's me, again.  Miss Barf 2007 reporting live from right outside a store all over the grass (classy!) and on my mom's ottoman (not on purpose, the bag broke).  My life is so glamorous sometimes, I cannot stand it.