Creole Wisdom

me as a mom

I've been thinking a lot about motherhood recently, more importantly the kind of parent I hope to be someday. While watching Freakanomics a quote resonated with me, "most of what you do to become a good parent you do before you are even pregnant or married." I could not agree more. When that time does come for me, this is the kind of mom I hope to be:

Gives them the life they deserve by being married before they're conceived

One who naps with them in my bed

Makes elaborate Halloween costumes

Bakes simple yet delicious recipes, like snickerdoodle cookies with them

Drives and picks up from school, volunteers in the PTA

Shares basic skills so adult life won't be a shock

Gives rides in the laundry basket

Sets an example of good money management

Does cool hair styles in the morning before school

Sings songs and introduces them to good music (you know, like Mariah Carey, Boys II Men and country)

Takes them to church and teaches about Jesus Christ

Reminds about the importance of being yourself

Shares history and family roots with them

In sum, I want to be a fun mom.

In the meantime, I get to practice on my little friend, Z

childhood memory

If you follow my photo a day 365 project you know I've started out this great year with a challenge. Yesterday's challenge was to photograph a childhood memory.

I was stumped.

Should I find a school and get a shot of a school bus (I hated, hated the school bus), dig out my American Girl dolls in storage, find a violin shop and get a photo of a kid's violin? I just didn't feel like any of those were it.

I went to Target and I thought about taking a photo of the trident cinnamon gum. That might do the trick.

It still didn't feel right, though.

This morning I stumbled upon this darling and poignant piece about fathers and daughters.

One of the sentences reminded me of how my dad used to wash my hair when I was little. We all know dad's have their own unique methods for bath time, but my dad's was the best.

He called it... chez daddy's... like he was trying to be fancy.

It wasn't the name that I hold dear, it's the huge plastic cups he used to rinse the shampoo out of my hair.

So, for my childhood memory I've got this, a cup on the edge of the bathtub to remind me:

Of years of great father-daughter memories

Of the fact that I had a dad growing up, which so many don't

Of dad's incredible patience

Of dad's humor and sincerity

Of his great love that has made me who I am today.

and yes that's an AOII cup with little pandas on it, haha

getting started

Since high school I've had in my possession all of my grandpa's photos. These albums span the early 1940s-late 1980s, with most of the images dating from my dad and his sibling's childhoods in the 1950s and 1960s.

I've put off this project for so long because I honestly didn't like the idea that I'd be spending hours scanning (that's not fun) and because I had no idea how to do it. I had no formula.

But I do now. It's good because I'm going to use this exact process on my mom's family photos sometime in the future and there are about three times more volume wise.

I started by sorting by family member and a few other categories mixed in like: military, Christmas and house/garden. I love that I have a photo of my grandma's kitchen from the 1950s, thank you grandpa for capturing that!

So far, this is my favorite image, my dad and grandma in their passport photo from early 1954:

SURPRISE!

I thought I had celebrated my birthday: dinner with family, shopping and a sushi dinner planned for January 5th. I had no idea that friends and family were scheming and dreaming a way to make turing a quarter century huge fun.

A few weeks into December mom asked if I would go bowling with the family. I agreed, we picked a date and then I went and did a photo shoot for work at Pinstripes. I told mom we should rearrange our bowling date from the kinda skeezy Park Tavern to the gorgeous Pinstripes because I also had a $10 coupon to use there. She said "no" because my stepdad really wanted Park Tavern, haha!

Thursday dawned and dad insisted on going to see War Horse. I didn't feel like spending 2.5 hours watching a film about a horse but agreed out of love for my dad. Dad told me several times that mom just wanted to be picked up, don't go into the house just honk the horn. As we pulled into her driveway he said, "don't get out, mom is coming out." I looked at him like he was crazy because he had already asked me to and I was fine waiting in the car. I just assumed my family was being slightly irritating, haha!

As we pulled into the parking lot at the alley mom said, "can you drop me off? My legs hurt." I thought that was ridiculous and seriously is she high maintenance! After my dad, stepdad and I parked the car we headed up to the door. There is mom waiting outside, I assumed she had forgotten to reserve a lane and we'd need to go home, the parking lot was full of cars!

As we walked inside mom said, "walk over there, our lanes our there." I look to my left and see that the lanes are full and I turn to her and said, "don't we need to get our shoes over here?" She basically pointed me back over to the right and all of a sudden a huge crowd jumped out and yelled: SURPRISE!

Becky, Chelle, Brittany and Kate all looking gorgeous

I was amazed! I was awestruck! I was so incredibly surprised and had no idea! I was shaking and slightly crying and still overcome with exciting emotion. There was a birthday sash, crown and glasses for me to wear. Birthday decorations were spread all over along with a big "25" balloon! On rolls of pink paper Ashley printed all sorts of facts on what happened in 1986 (my birth year.) Mom made a giant, double sided photo board of embarrassing photos of me growing up.

Ashley and Mom, the masterminds behind the surprise!

Turns out Ashley was the planner behind all of this. She coordinated, created a secret facebook event, hid wall posts, added frineds of mine she didn't know slowly so not to draw attention, planned everything and kept it all hidden from me! She worked with 25 people to write me 25 letters of their favorite memories of me from my Aunt Mary in New York to Anne all the way in Nebraska, I will cherish those letters forever! After bowling (at which I am horrible at, haha!) we headed back to my mom and stepdad's home for snacks and dessert.

All of the guests minus Brian and Donovan. We've mastered the "sorority squat!"

My mother, who is such a great host baked up polka dot cheese cake, Mexican chocolate cake and some fantastic appetizers. Ashley knows my love for sour candies and had a basket full of them! We toasted (sprite for me) and talked for hours. Then Emma put on her 1990s play list and we all reminisced about our childhoods :) We ended the evening watching Bring it On and eating an outrageous amount of candy.

Gorgeous (and newly engaged!) Marie and I :)

I am so grateful to the many wonderful people who came, the letters from family and friends near and far (even high school buddy Annalise who lives in France got to play, hi burberry bear!) and the love that they all showed me. I can't even begin to thank everyone. They made my birthday unforgettable!

I think 25 is off to a good start :)

a quarter century and blessed

I am so grateful. I have had a remarkably good 25 years when you look at it. I have been so blessed, more so than I deserve. Mostly, I have been blessed with wonderful people. I am so grateful to have such a good, loving family and spectacular, humorous and inspiring friends. I hope the next 25 years are just as swell*

For my big day I woke up late, spent some random time on google with mom and headed off to breakfast at the OPH in Edina! I love the OPH and go there each year on my birthday, I always order the cherry kajafa crepes... delectable!

Mom and I spent the rest of the afternoon doing what we do best, shopping! I'm awful, I know, but I decided to throw caution to the wind. We all want to look our best!

Mom and I hit up all the St. Paul favorites: Stephanies, C'est Fou, Anthro and Salut for a snack of baked brie :) I knew I had to make cheese part of my birthday somehow! I think my most exciting shopping moment of the afternoon was when I finally found a fur vest! I have been searching and searching for one since my friend Katherine told me about them. I am so glad I found one I love, I love fur (no shame!)For dinner mom made reservations at Bacio's. I love that place and the food is just as good as the elegant ambiance which makes you feel like you're in some old Italian cathedral. I indulged and ordered the gnocchi with bolognese sauce, I love bolognese sauce (if you have a good recipe please pass it along!)

I love this last photo of my three parents and I: those brick arch ways are incredible! I could stare up at that ceiling forever.  *I love that birthdays make you think and as much as I was dreading turning 25 and leaving my early twenties behind I had a fantastic birthday. Life is what you make of it.

Christmas review 2011

Christmas was in one word: wonderful. I had a lovely day spent with family and good food. We started the celebrating with evening mass on Christmas Eve at the Basilica. I was so happy that Becky and her family came as well. A poor elderly lady a pew ahead of us passed out and fell down, resulting in a fire department rescue which added a little bit more drama to the usual Catholic service! I knew it would be a holiday to remember after that!

For dinner we went all out and dined at Manny's. I guess I believe the holidays are not a time to mess around and I'm going to do decadence whenever I can because life is short. I about died from the richness of the food... and looking at the check!

Christmas morning I slept in (so wonderful) and got ready slowly, being sure to wear my new pink owl pajamas which I adore. Once my mom and step-dad returned from mass (they sing in the choir at their parish so they sing during a few services) we exchanged gifts. First up, stocking, or boots*:

I gave out traditional clementines, nut goodies for a certain sweet tooth, magazine subscriptions and a gift card to yogurt lab :) I love my cashmere hat and huge bag of sour patch kids. I carefully inspected the bag for dust- I love sour patch kid dust: yummy!

Perhaps my biggest surprise came when I opened a sequence of pretty boxes inside of each other to discover the 28mm 1.8 lens! It is incredible and takes stunning images (see below.) I am so grateful and excited and slightly up in arms trying to figure it out.

I loved shopping for family this year and tried to give thoughtful gifts, which I think were all well received and loved. Dad cannot stop raving about his new teapot... whatever works :) Special thanks to the Walker Art Museum gift shop for making holiday shopping for mom easy! I truly hope I have enough open shelving because my jadeite collection just grew by half!

For dinner we opted for a series of appetizers and dad cooked to impress, rock cornish game hens! I contributed caprese skewers, fondue and cucumber sandwiches.

After dinner we did what you probably did, too: napped. I managed to convince the family that We Bought a Zoo would be a smart choice for the traditional Christmas movie out. Then we lost the car in the parking lot and I got crabby. Oh well, Christmas must go on! I hope your holiday was merry + bright, full of surprises and a reminder of the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

*Oh yes, I got sick of dreaming about them, so I finally ordered a pair of shiny red hunters. Yaaaa! Extra yaaaa to my friend Kristy who ordered herself something fabulous and snappy, too. Girls gotta give and get :)

15/24 call my grandma once a month

My dad's mom, Grandma H is my only living grandparent. How did that happen?

Thankfully, since she was smart and married young (at 18) and had my dad young (at 19) I'm hopeful that she will be around for my wedding and kids someday.

I am so grateful for her. She is one of my favorite people.

Making time to call and chat with her has been one of the best parts of my 24th year. I love that she starts voice mesages with "hello, this is grandmother" (because I think the concept of caller id has gone over her head :) I am so grateful for her.

I thought I'd update this goal with a little grandma story. This is my favorite one:

When my grandma was a senior in high school in beautiful Savannah, Georgia she met her future, and much older husband while simply walking down the hallway between classes.

This was post WWII and my grandpa, Sargent First Class Willie B (not "William") from Atmore, Alabama was working as a military recruiter. One of his assignments was to visit the local high school and talk to boys about joining the forces.

He noticed my grandma walking down the hallway and had to have her.

Seriously. He pursued her incessantly and even tried to sweet talk my grandma's sister (great Aunt Mary) into convincing her sister to date him.

Well, I'm glad it all worked out because they married and created one of my favorite people: dad.

I love my grandma. She is sweet, southern, has the best recipes and loves my homemade Christmas cards.

Grandma Christmas 1956, notice dad's baby picture in the top right corner and all those cool kid's toy cookware (for Aunt Barbara.) I want to tinsel my tree just like this! Look at the scary clown, do you remember that dad?

surprises in store

This week was incredibly difficult for me. I still haven't really dealt with my breakup with K. The fall was a huge distraction: moving, home decor projects, friends visiting, visiting friends... It all started Thanksgiving and it was a challenging few days. Life is very hard sometimes. In the midst/because of all of this my faith is really struggling. I have a hard time believing that God is not punishing me or that my future isn't grim.

I think God can speak to us in dreams, maybe that's a little woo woo for you.

After having a better Wednesday I went to bed very late after our first substantial snowfall, and I had a dream:

I was back in dad's house from high school (which was big and beautiful.) I was decorating a six or seven foot artificial Christmas tree in the living room. I carefully took each glass, heirloom ornament out of the box and found a spot for it. It was the middle of the afternoon and sun washed in from the wall of windows to my right.

For whatever reason I decided to walk into the formal living room, what we called the music room becasue there was a piano there. As soon as I was in the room I noticed a gigantic and I mean gigantic, like 18 foot tree covered with the most beautiful Christmas damask fabric, like it was supposed to be hidden. I gasped. It was so stunning and festive. It took my breath away.

I went back into the kitchen and dad stood there.

"Dad, what is that? Did you get a second tree?" (in real life we used to do two trees, but never one as big as in my dream.)

"Yes. I was at Bachmann's paying for a wreath and they wheeled this tree by me. Apparantly it's a special kind of pine that doesn't get dry or age, even after it's been cut. Someone special ordered it, then didn't want it, so they sold it to me for an incredible price."

Then he threw the fabric off and I stared at the most gorgeous Christmas tree, one that would rival New York's Rokefeller Center.

Life is going to be fine. I just have to be willing to put down my own stuff and walk into a different room, maybe beautiful surprises will astonish me.

And, I love this dream because it is exactly something my father would do. As soon as I woke up I called him and he started cracking up.

favorite places to shoot

So, I thought I had all my favorite places picked out, but... I was just blown away by The Depot this weekend. It's my new favorite! Quick someone put a ring on their love's finger then e-mail me so I can shoot some engagements here! These two (my mom + stepdad) crack me up.

A few of my other favorite places are:

The sculpture gardens

Ingebretsen's mural wall

St. Anthony Main (mostly the Aster Cafe exterior)

I cannot wait to discover more favorites and I've got a few I've been eyeing that are kind of strange but perfect for photos. Sometimes I just drive around and look for spaces, I'm so weird.

thanksgiving report: friday

So, did you survive Thanksgiving? You know it's a lot of family time and that can be so good and sometimes a little bit bad. Aside from people not listening to me and bringing their own serving utensils for their dishes or forgetting half the stuff for their contribution or getting my toe stepped on my Thanksgiving was thisclose to perfect!

Let's be real: so I like to have things just right and planned all my dishes ahead. It's just what you have to do with the smallest kitchen in the midwest. I had my deviled eggs all prepped and put the empty egg halves into the refrigerator overnight. I woke up Thursday morning and half the eggs are frozen. Yes, frozen. I guess that was the clue to turn down the temp :) Don't worry, I salvaged them with steam from my red kettle.

Now, onto the photos and enough about my less-than-perfect Thanksgiving parts.

daily attire: pears + apron•three batches of cornbread dressing ready for the oven•mom's cranberry chutney in my milk glass•my spray painted halves•lion house rolls rising in the oven•place settings•greeting on the chalk board•the perfect plate•view from the couch•my rescued eggs•rolls are done•recipe book is open•dad and a pumpkin•the buffet patterns•cousin Ann + I•mom's dessert tray•Target at 1230am•more centerpieces•teas at the Starbuck's Target•mom+stepdad

It was so delicious and I can't wait to eat leftovers for days on end. Thankfully Maggie agreed to brave the Edina Target at 12am with me. I found these red pants that I can't live without. Haha.