(just bear with me this next week as commencement is upon me, and I just need to take it all in). Excuse me, how come no one ever tells you how emotional graduation is? College graduation. High School graduation was sad... um, kind of, except when you consider how thrilling one last summer and college orientation is. There is a lot to look forward to. Instead, with college graduation you get a giant blank slate. If you wanted, you could move to Australia, or just decide to live in an abandoned house. You can do what you want. The choices are overwhelming and freeing all at once.
Today, on the bus coming back from my morning class in which my dear professor shed a few tears about how we were going to make this country great, and change things (I want to) I thought to myself... I can take a dance class. I could run everyday. I could...
The choices are liberating and frightening and exciting.
I just walked back from my last class as an undergraduate at the U of MN. Forever. I am done (minus finals). It felt so bittersweet.
I wish I had lived in the moment more. This "week in the life" has been a perfect project for me. right now. it has forced me to live right now. Where was I the rest of the time? I am glad I wasn't always in "katie land" as j calls it when I zone out. I wish I had been present more. Gone to more exchanges, feeds, joined another club, skipped class to do something fun [but I did], and... the list goes on and on. But it's not fair to have regrets really because you cannot go back.
I am excited for the future, and my life from now on. I never imagined my existence as a college grad. Growing up, it was expected of me, but I had a few images of myself in my mind: going to high school, getting into college, going to college, and far off: getting married and being a mom. I am going to fill-in-the-blank.
