the awkward traveler

So did I ever blog about how I have a love-hate relationship with flying/traveling???

Oh, how nice that I have the time to do so and after paying $5 million dollars to get a "great deal" daily internet pass in lovely Milwaukee! Do you wish you were here? I know you do.

So this morning, as I awoke in the perfect land otherwise known was Kolab/Minnesota/Heaven on Earth I felt excited for my special spring break trip. What I was not so excited about were the two hefty writing assignments due the day I get back. Why Lord, why? I like to get my work done before break, but with these two it was impossible, so alas I'll be doing homework over spring break. Sort of like a death sentence. But I will arise and get it done-

Back to traveling. Flying makes me anxious. How can it not? I get on the big ton of tin with fake bird-wings that wiggle (eek) and never know if I'll get off. I just have too much to do here on earth, and dying in a plane crash is not something I want to happen.

Last night, while talking to Curtis he remarked: you are kind of worried. do you think that at any moment something bad might happen to you? You are big on safety.

Uh. Actually. Yes.

I am big on safety. Safety as in: carry kleenex and water with you, have some mace, check the doors to make sure they're locked before going to sleep, hide your purse at parties, call friends to check up on them when they are walking at night, pack a snack, bring an extra pen, check out your surroundings, trust your instincts... Yes. I have a testimony of safety.

Thankfully, nothing horrible has happened to me, but the worst is when I fly. When I fly I:
•Feel like I could BARF all over myself, the motion sickness bag, window, and nice lady sitting next to me
•Am afraid to look out the window and see small houses/roads/lakes and think of how high I am
•Pee really,really, really fast in case the plane starts to shake while I'm in the bathroom.
•Worry that someone will snatch my laptop/purse/really awesome peacoat from the security line
•That someone stinky and/or too talky with sit next to me or that a closet racist will and all the time he/she will be thinking about how much they hate black people...

My list goes on and on. It is so irrational. I have been flying all my life. I am fine. But it is not on my list of things I do for fun.

No. no. I would much rather be somewhere taking pictures and drinking perrier.

Comments

[kim in Camas - ScrapToMyLu]

Being a fellow safety queen, I say you're just fine. People love to try to tease me, but you learn to let it go.
Just wait til you have children....you'll really drive everyone crazy. :)
I hope you get your projects done quickly so you can enjoy some spring break time.

[Lisa Brown]

Your list brought back memories of the time Lily threw up all over herself on the plane, and then I proceeded to fill a few bags myself. It was so awful and so humiliating. My hardest part of flying is the clausterphobia, but as long as we are in the air, it is contained. It is only when we stop and everyone stands up, htat i freak out.

Hope you have a great trip and all goes well!

[JENEE HENRY]

"Closet racist." Girl, you know that's too funny. Sat next to one of those winners once....made him REAL uncomfortable. I was getting all up his space. It wasn't productive in the slightest, no new life-changing lessons to make him see the error of his ideas, no inter-racial bonding, just ol'-fashioned uncomfortability. It made me laugh, and for that...it was worth it.

[Tonya]

That closet racist part had me on the floor. Too funny, but I totally feel you.

[Tonya]

That closet racist part had me on the floor. Too funny, but I totally feel you.